------------------- BEST OF LETTERMAN ------------------- * 1 9 9 3 * by Dean Adams {dadams@netcom.com} http://www.nyx.net/~dnadams (April, 1994) This guide is a listing of various highlights from the Big Program, culled from my personal archives (and we all know how painful that can be). However, it should by no means be taken as a complete account of every episode. But hey... what did you pay for it? - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - --------------------------------- LATE NIGHT WITH DAVID LETTERMAN --------------------------------- JANUARY: 5. T10 Houston Oiler Excuses [show #1730] 6. stagehand theatre, T10 Signs Americans are Getting Dumber 7. ET story, new program ideas, Peggy the Foul Mouthed Chambermaid, T10 Excuses of the Home Alone Parents 8. Viewer Mail, Dalmations!, Tabitha Soren, T10 Signs the Guy Who's Pulled You Over isn't a Real Cop 12. T10 Campaign Promises Clinton is Least Likely to Fulfill [#1734] 13. Larry Bud/oil spill, T10 Problems That Doomed the Around-the-World Balloon Flight 14. cold open/cbs, bookmobile, Siskel & Ebert, T10 Real Reasons i'm Leaving NBC 15. viewer mail/roaches, lunch/staff nightmares, T10 Good Things About Being a Lame Duck President 19. Bush tribute, inaugeral quiz, Jennifer Tilly, [#1738] T10 Things That Will Get You Kicked Out of the Inauguration 20. Larry Bud/inaugural, phone/voice mail, T10 Things Clinton Had to do on His First Day 21. nameplate, Dave's videotapes, Father Guido Sarducci, Dave's predictions, T10 Signs Roger Clinton is Going to be Trouble 22. T10 Signs the Presidential Honeymoon is Over FEBRUARY: 2. T10 Other New White House Rules [#1742] 3. George Wendt, Paul "ALIVE" clip, T10 Signs You Have Too Much Body Hair 4. GE appliances, Biff rock, John Lovitz, Cher, T10 Ways to Cut $14 Billion From the Defense Budget 5. viewer mail, killing time, chef/cooking demo, T10 Signs it's a Slow News Day 9. Regis/valentine, Andie Macdowell, Morley Safer, comparison/clinton, T10 Signs J. Edgar Hoover Was Gay [#1746] 10. "Paul!" show clip, T10 Signs Hillary is in Charge 11. Richard Simmons, T10 Surprises in the Michael Jackson Interview 12. viewer mail, Bill Murray, T10 Signs that Your Hijacker is Dumb 16. Tell Us About Your Lunch/Dee Dee Meyers, [#1750] T10 Surprising Things About Clinton's Speech Last Night 17. Tell Us About Your Lunch/Johnny Carson, Kreskin, new taxes/effects, T10 Signs Your Film isn't Going to be Nominated for an Academy Award 18. Tell Us About Your Lunch/Dave's Mom, staff confessions, T10 Things Dumb Guys Were Thinking During Clinton's Speech 19. viewer mail, Larry Bud, stars in audience, Dave hypnotized, T10 Ways Things Would be Different if Roger Clinton Were President 23. Tell Us About Your Lunch, Tom Brokaw, Biff/whats quayle doing, T10 Reasons we're Staying in New York [#1754] 24. toy quiz, Jack Hannah, Pauly Shore, T10 Things Overheard at the Grammys 25. new magazines, electrician sketch, T10 Other New Rules at McDonalds 26. viewer mail plus, Martin Short, Dave goes door-to-door asking people about Clinton's speech, T10 Signs Your Doctor is Trying to Kill You MARCH: 2. Tell Us About Your Lunch/Al Gore, Larry King, [#1758] T10 Signs You've Hired a Bad Secretary 3. cold open/hsc, junk mail, budget cut effects, grocery bagging, T10 Relationship Problems for Michael Jackson and Brooke Shields 4. family fued, viewer mail, Sarah Jessica Parker, Dave leaves early/goes to bowling alley, T10 Larry King's Top 10 Complaints About Liz Taylor 5. T10 Clinton's Top 10 Recurring Nightmares 16. Tell Us About Your Lunch/Novello, [#1762] T10 Ways to Kill Time When You're Stranded in an Airport 17. Late Night cutbacks, Peggy the Foul Mouthed Chambermaid, T10 Irish Expressions for Sex 18. PEA BOY, Rachel Hunter, T10 Signs You've Joined a Bad Cult 19. viewer mail, Larry Bud/mouse, Dan Rather, T10 Signs its Your Cab Driver's First Day 23. Lets Look for Sweedes, Mary Tyler Moore, [#1766] T10 Signs Boris Yeltsin is Cracking Under the Pressure 24. Dennis Miller, NYC tourist tips, T10 Little Known Facts About "Nightline" 25. supermarket finds, airport camera, T10 Signs the Guys Trying to Put Out Your Burning House Aren't Real Firemen 26. Viewer Mail, Kathie Lee Gifford (stays), runaway camera, T10 Other Products Being Test Marketed by McDonalds 30. Call Meg, Teri Garr, George Miller, [#1770] T10 Things Overheard at the Oscars 31. weather/Al Roker, Paul becomes Ed McMahan, Pea Boy (#2), T10 Things Yeltsin Can do to Get His Popularity Back APRIL: 1. Dave's electronics, Michael Palin, T10 Signs You've Picked the Wrong Supreme Court Justice 2. viewer mail, Dave's superpower/opens jars, Jan Hooks, Kamar, NBC employee indoctrination tape, T10 Signs You're Not God 6. T10 Things Overheard at the Summit [#1774] 7. travel brochures, Catherine Ohara, T10 Things Aeroflot Can do to Improve its Image 8. Ellen Barkin, T10 Signs the Easter Bunny is Losing His Mind 9. viewer mail, Dave eating stuff montage, Phoebe Cates, Peggy the Foul Mouthed Chambermaid, Pea Boy theme song, T10 Signs You're an Extremely Boring Person 13. Dave's new licence, May We See Your Photos, Pete Fatovich joke, [#1778] science demo, T10 Horrifying Secrets of Barney the Dinosaur 14. new invitations, T10 Signs Larry King is Losing His Mind 15. William: the Page With the Fake British Accent, auto show quiz, Kirstie Alley, Harvey Picar, T10 Surprises in the New Sex Survey 16. Dave Letterman-Your TV Friend, viewer mail, Larry Bud, Pete's Pants, Eric Idle, T10 Surprises on the Clinton's Tax Return 27. lunch, new host, Tony Randal, [#1782] T10 Tips for the New "Late Night" Host 28. do for money quiz, William: the Page With the Fake British Accent, T10 Ways Clinton Can Improve His Approval Rating 29. T10 Things Overheard During Take Your Daughter to Work Day 30. viewer mail, Larry Bud, flying dog, Dave in magazines T10 Highlights of Roger Clinton's First 100 Days MAY: 4. Paul/strange voice, Call Meg, Conan Obrien, [#1786] T10 Signs Your Therapist Hates You 5. Tom Arnold, PEA BOY (trips/falls) T10 Signs You're Too Old to be Living at Home 6. Dave-TV friend, Dave's videos, Mike Meyers, guy in audience T10 Al Gore's Top 10 Pet Peeves 7. Viewer Mail, Martin Mull T10 Signs Your Postman Could be Ready to Snap 11. Hal Gurney's Network Time Killer, Jim Belushi/cigars, [#1790] T10 Signs the Guy Driving Your Subway Train isn't a Transit Employee 12. T10 Signs the World is Becoming Overpopulated 13. new toys, Sigorney Weaver (big broad), Paul/not charlie T10 Things Overheard During Clinton's Trip to New York 14. viewer mail, Larry Bud at CBS building, Sharon Stone The Strong, the Fat Guy, the Genius, T10 Ways This Show Would be Different if it Were Produced in Mexico 18. camera at Dave's house, Do you Speak English?, stupid pet tricks T10 Other Changes in the CBS Evening News [#1794] 19. coney island quiz, William: the Page With the Fake British Accent, T10 Little Known Facts About "Cheers" 20. baby pictures, killing time, Larry Bud/scale, Marilu Henner electronic moustache, T10 Signs Your Husband's a Loser 21. grapes/today show, Viewer Mail, Pea Boy/Peggy, Regis, haunted house, Marv Albert, T10 Signs America is Losing its Power 25. street cam, time killer, Sam Donaldson, Janine Turner, [#1798] T10 Shocking Revelations About Mick Jagger 26. NY street quiz, Jerry Seinfeld, Biff/Cheers update T10 Reasons Clinton's Approval Rating Has Declined 27. fleet week, warning labels, Susan St. James, T10 Things More - Embarrassing than Having a Baseball Bounce Off Your Head for a Home Run 28. Viewer Mail/Dave touched/Larry Bud, staff mistakes, Larry Bud hit on the head with a board clip, T10 Indy Driver Pet Peeves JUNE: 15. dino-kitty, Larry Bud (first appearance clip), Richard Lewis, [#1802] Katie Couric, Dave and models go to the beach, T10 Little Known Facts About Ruth Ginsburg 16. Dave vs. monkey clip, inventors convention clip (5/18/82), Penn and Teller/maggots, Dave's trip to the dentist clip (1990), T10 New Diet Pepsi Slogans 17. Rockettes deliver coke clip (11/20/91), Larry King/phone calls, memory expert clip (6/14/83), McDonalds drive-thru clip (4/6/90), T10 Signs You Have Dino-Fever 18. Steve Martin/card trick (12/10/87), Dave/syringe, stupid human tricks The Strong, the Fat Guy, the Genius, celebrity dry cleaning (2/25/82) T10 Signs Clinton's Temper is Out of Control 22. Stallone cold open, Joan Collins clip (5-28-89), [#1806] Sarah Jessica Parker, Anton eats bird (1/08/88) Dave/door-to-door survey clip (2/26/93), T10 Signs You're President Clinton's Long Lost Half Brother 23. dogs herd sheep, Pea Boy, Crispin Glover clip, Cher clip, Tom Brokaw, Marv Albert clip, Los Problemas, Biff/golf cart of death T10 Signs that Madonna Would Make a Good Mother 24. Arnold Schwarzenegger cold open, Dave dancing, Andy Kaufman clip, Dave's haircuts montage, Garry Shandling, Colleen Boyle letter clip, T10 Signs You're Going to be a One-Term President 25. Cheers cold open, Larry Bud, ice skating clip, Dave's suits montage, Tom Hanks, Bill Murray clip, visit to GE clip, Bruce Springstein, Late Night Anthem, T10 Things I Have To Do Before I Leave NBC, [Last show: #1809] - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - -------------------------------- LATE SHOW WITH DAVID LETTERMAN -------------------------------- AUGUST: 30. Late Show #1! Calvert DeForrest cold open, Tom Brokaw walk-on, theater renovations clip, construction workers, Bill Murray, Paul Newman ("Where the hell are the singing cats?"), Dave out looking for new ideas, spirit of Ed Sullivan, T10 Ways the New Show Will be Better 31. introduce band, clips from last night's show, robin williams T10 Things We Like About CBS SEPTEMBER: 1. scenes from last show, "fat dave" clips, Demi Moore (stays), cooking demo, T10 Signs Your New Job Isn't Working Out T10 Possible Names For Demi's New Baby (read by Demi Moore) 2. free beer, action stunts, plate spinner, Martin Short, Donnie: the CBS page who likes to suck up, Cyndi Lauper T10 Rejected Names For The New Show 3. carphone night, deborah winger (leaves as Wonder Girl), T10 Numbers From One to Ten (read with Casey Kasem) 6. Dave's carphone, Richard Lewis, Dave/pancakes, [#006] T10 NASA Excuses For Losing the Mars Probe 7. May we have some free stuff/tuxedo store, kicking field goals, Rosie Perez, T10 Bad Things About Living Longer 8. Al Gore cold open, VP security preps, Al Gore, Kim Basinger, T10 Signs You Have a Bad Airline Pilot, Read by Gore: Al Gore's Top Ten Good Things About Being Vice-President 9. Tony Randall in background, Dave's magazines, Ellen Barkin, Dave at Yankee Stadium, Dave on cover of Racquetball magazine, T10 Signs Clinton is Well Rested 10. S&E cold open, summer quiz, Siskel and Ebert, Tour of Ed Sullivan theatre/Calvert in the shower, Helen the ill tempered ticket lady, Top Ten w/Bob Denver: T10 Announcements That Will Make This Crowd Cheer Wildly 13. May we have some free stuff/passport photo, [#011] Steven Wright, T10 New Campbell Soup Slogans 14. tying tie, warning labels, Mars Observer falls into theater, biff/hypnotism, T10 Things Overheard at the White House Yesterday 15. Dave gets air freshner, roof cam/Regis, Biff Henderson, T10 Rejected "60 Minutes" Stories 16. CBS mailbag/GE jokes, Bonnie Hunt, Ben-the guy who really loves milk, T10 Ways to Make Arafat Angry 17. back to school supplies, Clinton lookalikes, Laura Dern, T10 Highlights of Clinton's Health Care Plan 20. meet the neighbors: copy shop/hello deli, Sarah Jessica Parker, Sarah Jessica Parker xeroxes her face, [#016] T10 Reasons To Watch CBS This Fall 21. Dave at home, Dave Letterman-Your TV Pal, Ellen Degeneres T10 Signs Your Neighbor is a Talk Show Host 22. Dave at stadium: raining/tarp, roof cam/Calvert at Flashdancers, James Earl Jones/annoucement, Tony Randall at Flashdancers, T10 Signs You've Lost Control Of Your Country 23. Dave's record collection, Belinda Carlisle, T10 New York Mets Excuses (Don Knotts in audience) 24. CBS mailbag/Dan Rather, nypd blue joke, Pete Fatovich birthday, Glen Close/sits on audience member's lap, T10 New York Mets Excuses 27. Dave takes stand by audience to Miss Siagon, [#021] T10 Signs You've Come to the Show on a Bad Night 28. Jimmy Carter cold open, Dave at home/shooting fruit, greeting cards, Jimmy Carter, cooking demo/clams, T10 Complaints of the Biospherians 29. chase scenes, spirt of Ed Sullivan/juggler, T10 Questions Congress Asked Hillary Clinton 30. white house souveniers, T10 Signs You Have no Friends OCTOBER: 1. Dave reads intro: "It's the Late Show, with me Dave!", Beavis and Butt-head clips, Andie Macdowell, Paul/"love boat" jacket, Dave questions Hillary Clinton, Dave and Paul at the park, T10 Signs You're On A Bad Date 4. Stallone cold open, Call Meg/sketch artist, Janine Garafolo, [#026] T10 Rejected Freedom Airlines Slogans 5. CBS voice mail, Dave home videos, T10 Madonna's Hotel Demands 6. Late Show library books, Donnie-the CBS page who likes to suck up, T10 Ways To Annoy A Supreme Court Justice 7. Dave fixes broken desk, Don Rickles, guy loves bright shiny objects, Tracy Ullman, T10 Things That Will Get You On The Evening News 8. mailbag, stars in audience, Connie Chung, strange odor in building, end credits/Calvert, T10 Ways Clinton Can Pay for the Health Care Plan 11. roof cam/order pizza for Flashdancers, Kathie Lee Gifford, [#031] T10 Things Columbus Would Say if He Landed in America Today 12. Calvert outside/giving temperature, new studio quiz, pet tricks, Howard Stern, T10 Signs You're Being Investigated by "60 Minutes" 13. James Earl Jones/annoucement, new show ideas, Kirstie Alley T10 Things Overheard on the Clinton's 18th Anniversary 14. madonna on bike clip, Dave reflects, Sean Young, FDA rejects, T10 Sign of Trouble in the Darryl Hannah/JFK Jr. Relationship 15. Dave and Dan Rather trade ties, Tom Arnold, everybody loves Zsa Zsa, human cannonball, T10 Reason's Hillary Won't be Invited Back to "Sesame Street" 18. meet the neighbors/bagle shop, Dennis Miller, Sandra Bullock, [#036] T10 Dan Quayle's Complaints About Clinton (with Gavin Macleod) 19. Paul/visits CBS nurse, Clinton/rats, Dave's predictions T10 Signs You Have a Dumb Dog (with Gavin Macleod) 20. false alarms, Dan Rather, Gavin Macleod has Top Ten list, T10 Reasons Dan Quayle Would Make a Good President 21. planes takeoff at JFK, Bob Newhart, Don Rickles in audience, T10 Signs the Guy Mugging You Has Never Mugged Before (Gavin Macleod) 22. CBS gifts, Dave gets CBS ID card, Martin Mull, cooking demo, T10 Signs Hillary is the Smartest Clinton (with Gavin Macleod) 25. Sean Connery cold open, meet the neighbors/electronics store, [#041] jet pack entrance/Sean Connery, Fran Drescher, T10 Reasons Canada Keeps Beating us in the World Series 26. Mailbag-Paul/joke, Phil Donahue/audience questions, roof cam/cast from "Cats", T10 Generic Top Ten List (home office closed) 27. Regis roulette/Calvert/Marv Albert, Cindy Crawford, Chris Elliott/film #1: "Housewives! Making of the Cast Album" T10 Revelations in the Packwood Diary 28. NYC gifts quiz, "the turban is not for sale", Dave's sitcom promo: "Jimmy^3", T10 Signs Leona Helmsley is Rehabilitated 29. kids/halloween costumes, Dave and Paul go golfing, James Earl Jones/daylight savings time, T10 Signs You Got a Bad Flu Shot NOVEMBER: 1. James Earl Jones/announcement, Dave hails cab, [#046] people ride cab around the block, cooking demo/food fight, T10 Ways to Make the Pillsbury Bakeoff More Exciting 2. voting instructions, pamphlets, astronaut clip, Teri Garr, roof cam/jumbotron screen, Paul Simon, T10 Signs There's Voter Fraud in Your Precinct 3. Dave voting clip, family reunions/Tony Randall/Calvert Faith Ford, T10 Good Things About Being Mayor of New York City 4. Dave goes to Hello Deli for coffee, family fued, Garry Shandling, T10 Ways to Mispronounce "Newt Gingrich" 5. Dave's diary/cspan, Andy Rooney visiting the offices, T10 Signs You've Elected a Bad Mayor 8. audience member gift/Rock America, Michael Keaton, [#051] T10 Parachute Guy Excuses 9. Mujibur/Sirajul clip, warning labels, prize wonderland/Dian Parkinson, T10 Things Overheard at the Gore-Perot Debate 10. Dave calls Gore-Perot, mailbag/high school, Dave's teeth cleaned, Mary Tyler Moore, price wonderland/Dian Parkinson, Rita Rudner, T10 Signs Ross Perot is Losing His Mind 11. Johnny Carson/stump the band, Paul/physical comedy video, price wonderland/Dian Parkinson, T10 Disturbing Examples of Violence on TV 12. NYC at night quiz, guy parachutes into studio, Carol Kane, CBS tour, price wonderland/Dian Parkinson, T10 Signs Your Date is Not Having a Good Time 15. phone booth/woman watches show from on stage, [#056] Late Show staff/marathon photos, T10 Things Overheard at the NYC Marathon 16. boxing announcer, roof cam/stolen, Dave's stitches taken out, T10 Reasons Puerto Rico Does Not Want to Become a State 17. bowling outside, Ed Asner/celebrity jeopardy clips, John Lovitz, stupid human tricks, T10 Lorena Bobbitt Excuses 18. charts and graphs, Hello deli/sandwich for Dave, T10 NAFTA Provisions (Canadian "Coffee Mounty" appears) 19. Dave leaves/Paul finds him at "Cats", Dalmations!, Dana Carvey, T10 Signs Al Gore is Loosening Up 22. meet the neighbors, Marilu Henner, [#061] T10 Demands Of The Striking Flight Attendants (new graphics) 23. T10 Deals Clinton Had to Make to Get NAFTA Through Congress 24. nafta, mailbag, Bryant Gumbel, cooking demo-Dave/Bryant, Dave reflects, T10 Senator Packwood's Top Ten Dating Tips 25. call mom, Calvert at thanksgiving parade, Penn and Teller, T10 Thanksgiving Movies in Times Square 26. Dave at McDonalds, stars in audience, T10 29. Dave's year end checklist, T10 Signs You've Eaten Too Much [#066] T10 Stores That Won't do Much Business This Holiday Season 30. Dave's auto shop, Robin Williams, T10 Signs the Nanny You Have Hired is Really a Man DECEMBER: 1. plot twists, T10 Signs the Theater is Too Cold (with Calvert) 2. Chris Elliott/film #2: the Traveling Poet, T10 Signs You've Hired a Bad Department Store Santa 3. staff lunch, Jack Hannah, T10 Good Things About Marrying Tom and Roseanne 13. Dave/beard, Clinton story, [#071] T10 White House Christmas Traditions 14. Dave gets shaved, T10 Things Overheard on Clinton's New York Shopping Spree 15. Dave/Paul sing "Pasty White Thighs", T10 Reasons Donald Trump Will Make a Good Husband 16. Biff Henderson, Dave/xmas tree, staff vacations, egg toss, T10 Real Reasons Les Aspin is Leaving 17. handwriting analysis, "Dave Letterman" playing fiddle clip, T10 Things Overheard at the CBS Christmas Party 20. staff/skating party, rock america/orament, staff bonuses, [#076] T10 Signs You Bought a Bad Christmas Tree (talking xmas tree) 21. roof cam/Miss Siagon cast/bows, Dave at home/chugging egg nog clip, T10 Things Overheard at the Trump Wedding (talking xmas tree) 22. roof cam, phobias/Zsa Zsa/Tony Randall T10 Inaccuracies About the White House 23. rotating pies, police horse, Dave psyched!, Pete Fatovich, Beavis and Butthead, T10 Christmas Movies in Times Square 24. [no show] 27. Calvert/outside temps, street/phone booth, [#081] T10 Signs it's Cold in New York 28. Regis wins award, T10 Ways Santa Relaxes (Santa at Flashdancers clip) 29. CBS mailbag, snow, Bonnie Hunt, cbs sports, T10 Things Overheard on Clinton's Duck Hunting Trip 30. Dave at home, Tony Randall/gun, Julia Roberts, cooking demo, T10 Signs You're Not Getting a Year End Bonus 31. show on jumbotron screen, staff, new year/calvert T10 Least Popular Alcoholic Beverages (with backup singers) --==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==-- Note: you may freely copy and distribute this guide for personal use provided that it be distributed in it's entirety, with all original author and copyright information intact. Any sales of this document are expressly forbidden, without the specific consent of the author. [ Copyright (c) 1994, Dean Adams. All rights reserved. ] --==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==-- Internet: dadams@netcom.com, dnadams@nyx.net WWW URL: http://www.nyx.net/~dnadams Home ftp site: ftp.netcom.com, directory: /pub/gu/guides --==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--