To: alt.sex.strip-clubs@anon.penet.fi
Subject: Armchair Psychology
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>blawndy: Why do customers go PSYCHO?    17 Feb 1996 11:27
>Organization: Primenet Services for the Internet
>
>I have a customer that just went off the deep end. He actually wanted to
>get married and have kids. He sat in my club yesterday and cried from
>2-8pm because I said I would no longer table dance for him. He told
>other customers things that were untrue and made a complete fool of
>himself.
>

Blawndy, and faithful fans in Pajama land,

It sounds like this guy has a very strong psychological attraction to you.
Love might not be word for it.
Falling off the "deep end" sounds very descriptive.

It's an experience I've been through maybe a hundred times.

The label I attach to it is "infatuation".

I don't have much control over it; I told one friend, "It's like catching
the flu."

Now that I'm 36 I don't become infatuated that often.  When I do fall into
that state, it's less intense than it used to be.  Also I'm much more
objective about it; it does not consume all of my mental energy the way
it used to.

When I was younger, it was at the core of my being.  Barely a day would pass
when I was not thinking about "Her".  The object of my desire would usually
change every week or month, but it always seemed like I was obsessed with
some woman.

It started early, way before puberty.  Let's see:
-the baby sitter
-the pretty girl in 3rd grade
-the student teacher in 4th grade
-my 6th grade teacher

Then, in Jr High, I reached puberty.  These obsessive feelings started to mix
with feelings of lust.  What potent mix that was (still is too).

In high school I bumped into a couple of girls who thought like me.
The infatuation was mutual!  So was the lust!

It has happened a few times since High School but not often enough.

Making love to a woman that I'm obssesed with who feels the same way about me
is certainly one of life's sweetest moments.  It has been a rare thing in my
life, so it just might be the thoughts rambling around in my brain when I
lie on my death bead at the age 136.

Blawndy, take heart.  If this guy is like me, he will be making marriage
proposals to another woman in the next few days/weeks/months.

As an Armchair Psychologist, I've discovered that infatuation and love
are very different states.  Infatuation is a negative state which is
often accompanied by other negative feelings like insecurity, anxiety,
jealousy, anger, and fear.  Also it is often negative for the person
who is the object of desire.

If I love a woman, I'm in a much more serene, comfortable state.  The words
security, permanence, and trust come to mind.

In my life when I've mixed love and lust it's always been good but not
nearly as intensly pleasurable as making love to a woman I'm obssesed
with.  I wonder if other guys (and women) feel that way or am I "twisted".
Maybe I'm just a befuddled SNAGGIE.

.
-Bob "Armchair Psychologist/Patient" Smyth
.